Well, this morning I woke up to find out I’ve been shortlisted for The Dog’s Doodah’s UK’s funniest blog award.
I know, I’m as shocked as you.
Apparently, as well as being able to hold the title as UK funniest blog for the next year there’s also £200 up for grabs, (or a Nexus 7 tablet, which is about as much use as a chocolate fucking teapot to me considering I can barely text.)
So, if I do win, (which I’m fully aware is a massive long shot) it’ll not only be an absolutely amazing honour and definitely a reason to crack open the fancy rum I’ve been saving since Christmas, but it’ll also mean I have £200 in my ‘money raised’ pot when I abseil down Liverpool’s Anglican Cathedral to raise money for Freshfields Animal Rescue*.
Just to give you a bit of insight into this absolutely stupid and potentially fatal abseil I’ve
been tricked into doing decided to embark upon; it’s happening in August so, naturally it’ll no doubt be blowing a fucking gale and pouring down. So, whilst battling the elements of British summertime, I’m planning on trusting a couple of complete strangers who, for all I know, could be ex-prisoners – or, even worse, hungover – to strap me to a few ropes an then allow me to bounce the 101 metres down to ground. And apparently I’m going to stay alive doing this.
Luckily the fella organising it said that no one has died abseiling down yet. Yet.
So, if any of you sexual people enjoy this here blog and wouldn’t mind voting using this link, that would be really, really fabulous… and I will totally buy you all a drink.
Or post you a drink.
Or have a drink in your honour.
Probably that last one.
(*Freshfields Animal rescue is a not-for-profit charity based in both Liverpool and Wales that’s dedicated to saving the lives of abandoned, abused and unwanted animals. Not only do they have a strict policy to never put a healthy animal down, but I can honestly say that both the staff and volunteers do a truly incredible job every single day for little to no appreciation. To find out more about the charity, or to spend the next hour looking at ADORABLE pictures of dogs and then crying into your dinner because your landlord won’t let you have pets, have a look here.)