6 Steps To Total Body Confidence…

In a world where we’re bombarded with images of “perfect” celebrities with their “perfect” lives on a daily basis, it’s hardly any wonder that we don’t always feel great about ourselves…

You’ve seen her…that woman that seems to have it all.  She’s hot, she’s got killer style, and her swagger says that she’s absolutely confident that she can take on any challenge at anytime and get exactly what she wants.

Don’t you want to be her?  I wished I could have been that woman earlier in my life. Trust me I haven’t always been a ray of sunshine, it takes a lot of work to feel and look as damn good as I do now.

But after years of not getting what I wanted or achieving the success I wanted, I realized I was holding myself back. I didn’t feel confident in my own skin. I’m sure you have felt that way one time or another. Listen to me, at the risk of sounding like a self-help public service announcement – YOU are amazing and YOU are going to stop holding yourself back.

Even if you think you are the SHIT, there is always room for improvement. It feels great to have self confidence which will only bring you more success in life.

Here’s a few of my secret steps that you can use daily to feel good about yourself and build killer self confidence:


A positive one goes a long way. Really no one wants to hang out with a crabby bitch. You are allowed to have a bitchfest or a bad day.  But sometimes you need to plaster on your cheesiest grin and force your glossed lips into a smile, even when all you want to do is scream into the nearest pillow or wine glass.

You’ve heard the saying… you have to fake it  until you make it.

And eventually your faux positivity rubs off on you and starts to become real. You’ll find yourself slowly becoming happier and as a result your mood improves and those amazing endorphins (feel good hormones) start getting released. Try to focus your energy on the NOW, remember you cannot change your past but you can only move forward. Smiles are contagious!

Dress the part

For all that is HOLY take those nasty sweat pants off and put on your sexy jeans. Throw some makeup on. Lady, you know it really takes very little effort. It takes the same amount of time to put on real jeans as it does pajama jeans.  (You know who I’m talking to) When you dress good you feel good. I know those days when you don’t even want to wear a bra, but unless you have amazing tits, for the rest of mankind’s sake please put one on.  This is where you need to let go of self doubt. Stop worrying about your little belly or frizzy hair.

This might take a while, but be positive. If you find yourself saying “I hate my thighs” stop it right now and say “I love my thighs” – weren’t those thighs that you were just complaining able to help you get through your last yoga class?  Accentuate YOUR positive.  If you have gorgeous eyes, play them up or you love your breasts, throw on a cute top and put them on display for everyone to admire!

Working Out

Drinking wine and complaining is no longer considered exercise.  I know hard to believe, right?! Don’t worry about those skinny bitches at the gym, or those annoying grunting muscle heads. Get to the gym or take a brisk walk outside. Working out creates endorphins which trigger positive feelings helping create confidence. Working out helps to improve your physical appearance so you can look hot in your new bikini and in turn helps your emotional well-being. Now that’s a win-win for just you, you’re welcome.

Avoid Negative Bitches

Stay away from them. You know the saying “misery loves company”. People who are miserable need someone to put down, it makes them feel better about themselves.

Attitudes rub off, whether good or bad.

 Negative Thoughts

If you keep thinking negative thoughts you will start to believe them and then they will most likely come true.  You need to turn your thinking around. Try saying a daily affirmation to yourself in the mirror.

Tell yourself how wonderful and amazing you are! Because you are fucking amazing!

Be thankful for what you have or what you like about yourself. Look around, and then look at your gorgeous self and appreciate your skills, your looks, your smarts, and your badass.

Stop Comparing

Look – I love my InStyle as much as you do, but you cannot compare yourself with Angelina Jolie or Halle (I wake up beautiful) Berry.  Every day you and I are bombarded with pictures of gorgeous models, television shows with beautiful, successful rich bitches… I watch a lot of Bravo. We need to stop comparing ourselves to everyone else. Be your own person. Strive to be the BEST you can be. No one is perfect (Although, I’m pretty close) so stop trying to be perfect…it is NOT going to happen.

Being the most confident woman in the world doesn’t happen overnight. Keep reminding yourself that you are beautiful and worthy of your own love.

 Smile and Fake it till you make it!!

Jade Alexander is a hot mummy, wife, writer and all around funny girl. Jade believes anything worth doing is worth doing well… as she outlines in her fabulous book Make up and Blowjobs. She has a passion for makeup and all things girly, and spends most of her time looking for ways to spice it up in the bedroom or wasting time on Facebook.

13 comments… read them below or add one

Mummys Mascara May 28, 2012 at 11:40 am

Great tips! Especially the one about not comparing yourself to others – you can spend your whole life wanting to be like someone else and completely overlook all the brilliant and beautiful things about yourself xx


Scarlett May 28, 2012 at 3:22 pm

Totally agree Mummy’s! x

Me too Kelly – you never regret a workout! x

Couldn’t have said it better myself Melissa! As Jade says, it’s often about Faking it before you make it! x

Lol Annette – wine always makes exercise more fun! x


Kelly May 28, 2012 at 11:41 am

Cool advice! A work out always makes me feel better :)


Melissa May 28, 2012 at 12:00 pm

Love this post!! Sometimes a girl just needs to read these things to be reminded that you don’t need to be a model to be gorgeous. A little self-confidence can go such a long way!


Annette | Bucket List Journey May 28, 2012 at 3:08 pm

Drinking wine is not exercise? Damn. Can I at least drink wine while I exercise 😉


plantdotty May 28, 2012 at 11:06 pm

Brilliant stuff…I too shall drink wine while I walk.x


Scarlett May 29, 2012 at 8:35 am

Me too Plantdotty! x

I think, as women, we naturally compare ourselves to others Jenn – but we end up overlooking how fabulous we are! x

Isn’t it Jess! We are definitely fucking amazing! x


Jenn May 29, 2012 at 5:59 am

Great advice. Especially the part about stop comparing–and probably the hardest one for me to get past.

Thanks for sharing :) Cheers!


Jess May 29, 2012 at 8:09 am

I like the line ‘because you are fucking amazing’! All true stuff that I already know, but constantly need reminding of. Checked out Jade’s blog, it’s hilar!


Holly May 29, 2012 at 2:52 pm

This is an amazing post!!! I have printed it out and will stick it on my fridge as a daily reminder :)
The first point is especially true, it’s astonishing how ‘faking it’ does really rub off on you. Even when I smile to myself for no reason, it completely lifts my mood. I end up radiating positivity and that can brighten up someone ELSE’s day so win win win!
Hitting the gym after this, thanks for this great post Scarlett :)


Scarlett May 29, 2012 at 2:54 pm

A simple smile always lifts my mood too Holly :) Thanks for visiting x


Jackie S May 30, 2012 at 3:33 pm

I love this post. This is perfection. I wish more people/society/media would proclaim this and maybe, just maybe, more people would love themselves!


Scarlett May 30, 2012 at 6:51 pm

i totally agree Jackie xx


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