Listen, honey, I’m about to hit you with some tough love truth:
If he wanted to speak to you, he would have text or called.
Yes, I know you like him and I know it feels rubbish to be strung out… NO don’t you dare look away to check to see if he’s text!
…He hasn’t has he?
As I was saying, I know you really like this one – but the fact of the matter is, if he hasn’t got in touch for a few days then it’s highly unlikely that he’s lost his phone/been hit by a bus/been building a school in Africa. In actual fact he’s just not that bothered.
And, frankly, if he’s not grafting to keep you in his life he really doesn’t deserve you, does he?
But don’t fret, pretty girl, we’ve all been there at some point. So by all means, watch Bridget Jones and have a good moan to your mates. But don’t, I repeat DO NOT text him.
It’s harder than it sounds, I know. Abstaining from texting is a serious business, I’ve put together seven things you should do instead of reaching for that phone…
- Get your nails done. No, I don’t just mean lash a quick coat on before you rush out the door, book an appointment at the salon and treat yourself to some nail art that will send the #nailsonfleek hashtag into meltdown. If you need some inspiration, the dolls at essie nail polish have put together “A touch of Luxury” e-book to make sure your claws are Insta-worthy. Not only will you feel fab, but it’ll keep those fingers away from your phone for an hour or so!
- Workout. You’ve already lost 12 stone of inadequete male, you might as well graft to lose those stubborn few pounds off your hips.
- Go through your knicker draw… and bin anything that doesn’t make you look a strong 8/10 in the right lighting.
- Have a bath. Make an event of it; take your laptop in and lash a good film on Netflix. Shave your legs. Then, when you get out, body brush and moisturise. Who needs a man when you are a silky mermaid goddess and nobody can catch you?
- Check your bank balance. And smile because they’re no longer draining it
- Upload a flawless selfie to Instagram. You know they’re checking so you might as well remind them what an absolute 10 you are. Take your time perfecting it. Treat yourself.
- And finally… ring your best mate. Who will kindly remind you of every single thing he ever did wrong to you, to fashion and to humanity.Stay strong girl, you got this.
Until next time… x