This is an actual phone conversion between myself and The Boyfriend, that took place last week when his sister was visiting for the weekend to celebrate her birthday…
Me: Have you got Rach a card and pressie for her Birthday yet?
Me: You do know it’s her Birthday today and we’re seeing them tonight don’t you.
Boyfriend: Yeah I know, but she’s already been round this morning so she knows I haven’t.
Me: She’s been round? So… did you just tell her you’re a terrible brother and you forgot??
Boyfriend: No! I gave her all those out of date tokens of ours for the pier… and I found one of my old birthday cards and just crossed the names out and changed them.
Me: You gave her an old birthday card with the names changed? Wow, so you ARE a shit brother.
Boyfriend: …I drew her a picture too. It took me ages.
Me: Oh god, what did you draw.
Boyfriend: I’m not telling you… I might have got carried away.
Me: …tell me.
Boyfriend: OK, but for the record she thought it was really funny.
Me: Oh god…
Boyfriend: *giggling* It was a vagina looking at itself in the mirror.
He wasn’t lying either…