Scarlett Guides To Life…

There are few people in this world as passionate about their hometown as Scousers, and frankly I’m no exception. From the nights out to the historic architecture; I’m that dickhead sat in the corner of a pub raving about Liverpool to anyone or anything that’s not nailed down.

So, because in between NSFW tales involving dwarf porn and diet horror stories, I like to give you something remotely useful. So I conferred with the fabulous Oh Bella and we came up with ten things you need to know before you visit Liverpool.

1. Scousers are the friendliest people in the world.

This is just fact. If you walk into the toilets of any bar and ask if anyone has a mascara you can borrow, you’ll come out with a full face (with lashes) done by a MUA who was just nipping in for a quick wee.

2. Swerve worrying about thieves.

Contrary to the incredibly dated and deeply unfunny jokes about robbing cars, (I’m looking at you Jimmy Carr) there’s no more crime in Liverpool than there is in any other city in the UK. You’re not going to get pick-pocketed but you might get your shoes skitted, so forget packing any kitten heels or toms.

3. Getting around

Everywhere in the city centre is within walking distance but, as we’ve already discussed, you’re going to leave your kitten heels at home aren’t you? But if you’re getting burny feet in your 6 inches don’t worry, you’re never more than 15 yards from a taxi rank. Also, if you’re spending any time in the Albert Dock be aware that it’s cobbled – and as we all know cobbles are the kryptonite of any girl in heels – so be vigilant girls, and make sure your mates/family/fella are close by to scoop you off the pavement if you go down like Bambi on ice.

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(Photo: Chris McKay)

4. It can be colder than you think

Because we’re right on the River Mersey, it can feel a lot colder and windier than your weather app would have you believe – especially if you’re walking along the Pier Head or across to the Albert Dock. Do yourself a favour and pack a coat with a hood if it’s raining, because I promise your brolly won’t be making it back in one piece.

5. Total eclipse of the S*n

The absolute shitrag of a newspaper; The S*n, is completely outlawed in Liverpool after the horrific lies it printed after the Hillsborough disaster. You’d be hard pushed to find a shop that even sells it, and frankly, if you’re that desperate to read it you’re probably better heading to a different city.

6. Our architecture is something else.

Between two gorgeous cathedrals, the famous Liver Building and countless other fit as fuck buildings, you’re spoilt for choice when it comes to architecture in the city. My favourite hidden gem is the Picton Reading Room in Central Library, so make sure you pop in. Oh, and all the most intricate features are on the tops of the buildings, so don’t forget to look up.

7. Football is a big deal

Both Liverpool and Everton are surrounded by history, and if you want to know more head to the Liverpool Museum at the Pier Head for the lowdown (also good for all the boxing and music history too). But be aware that Football is like oxygen to most lads in the city, so it’s best not to make any big travel plans on Match Days

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(Photo: Elliot Mc)

8. We love our independents

Yeah we’ve got all the usual chains, Nandos, Pizza Express etc – but we’re big when it comes to independant bars and restaurants. Seel Street and the Baltic Triangle are where you want to be.

9. We’re a shopaholic’s dream

Obviously we have the famous Liverpool One if you’re after the big names, but if you’d prefer something a bit more unique and quirky, you’ll want to give Bold Street a visit – and don’t forget to stop off at the indy restaurants to refuel.

10. There’s something for everyone

Scousers are renowned for being glamourous – and it’s true that we have some of the most fabulous bars and restaurants. But if you’re just after a night of messy dancing in your jeans and flats, head to Mathew Street for Irish craic at Flanagans or the kind of karaoke you can cringe about tomorrow at The Grapes. But bear in mind that the bars are boss, but the toilets are generally shit – so take some tissues in your bag.

Have fun… x

 

 

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