Relationships & Sex

Heartbreak is fucking awful, isn’t it.

Even if the relationship was shitty, even if you were the one who ended it; the first few weeks after a break up are a timeless jumble of crying, vodka, googling quotes about love, shouting, more crying and even more vodka.

So if you’re in the midst of breakup turmoil, here’s my advice for getting over your ex.

Block him

It’s no secret that when a relationship ends, selfie games step up a notch. Suddenly everything becomes an occasion for red lippy and a Kodak moment. You need him to know that the break up hasn’t affected you in the slightest and, ‘as it happens dickhead’, you’re having the time of your life without him.

We’ve all been there. You compulsively check your phone to see if he’s viewed the Snapchat story of your outfit from Saturday night and, in your darkest moment, you briefly consider getting the tattooed arm of the random lad next to you on the train into the pic, in a desperate attempt to make him jealous.

You know it’s not healthy and you definitely know that, if you do see another woman on his instagram – that you uncontrollably check on the hour, every hour – you’ll go to bits. But you can’t seem to stop. Well, it’s tough love time, doll: if they wanted you back, it’s not going to be off the back of a pouting mirror selfie. It’ll be because they want you. All of you; the dolled up you, but also all your flaws, in your scruffs with your hair up laughing at shite on the telly. And if they don’t, then don’t waste any more of your energy on them. Block the bastard and crack on with making memories for you, not just for him to see.

block your ex

Don’t lose sight of reality

When anything comes to an end it’s only human to look back with rose coloured glasses; whether it’s a toxic friendship, a dead-end job or that questionable chicken burger you had at 3am that tasted amazing until it gave you the shits.

Relationship’s are no different and you’ll probably find yourself looking back fondly at old memories, remembering that kind-of funny joke he told rather than the 3 hours he spent sulking and generally being a gobshite. Don’t let yourself be fooled, remind yourself of all his bad qualities, the shit that annoyed you and the arguments that left your sobbing into your pillow deep into the night. I know it’s not the nicest way to spend an hour, but make a list if you have to, then rip it up and remind yourself you’re better off without him.

how to get over your ex

Find something that’s just yours

I’m going to take a stab in the dark and assume that a lot of your own hobbies and interests took a back seat to things the two of you could do together – well now’s the time to get out there and follow your own dreams. Take up a new class, start a new hobby or just go and get a good pamper – just something that you never got round to doing while you were with him.

get over your ex

And finally, give yourself time. That’s the only thing that can really cure a broken heart. I know it feels shit now, but I promise you’re going to look back and be glad you dodged a bullet!

Until next time… x

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